During the 90’s, I remember attending one of my first summer retreats with church youth. I had gone camping with my family previously, but I think this marked the first time I would be absent of my parents and siblings. I was eager to go, because my brothers went before me and talked endlessly about their experiences when they returned. Keep in mind that this was one of the most exciting things for Me at that time: before affordable cell phones and high-speed wireless internet, before discovering video games; before an uncomfortable adolescent era. The summer that I turned 10, I finally went to camp.
One of the activities I recall most often involved group reading and reflection. I don’t remember which scriptures were referenced, but our discussion revolved around Lepers; people suffering disease and being cast from society. After reading, we were asked to write as if we witnessed Leprosy first hand. I wrote from the point of view of the Leper, asking God and others forgiveness for my unsightly appearance. When I shared my short essay, it brought the youth leader to tears. She asked if I knew anyone suffering illness or with physical disfigurement - at that time I didn't, but I understood loneliness. At the ripe age of 10, I identified with the Leprosy Stigma.
Two decades later, the Spotted Leper appears once again.
~
Earlier this year, I came across Well-Wishers regarding the ongoing family drama. I explained my issues with the situation, being barred from my niece and nephew. To which they responded, "I would be crushed if I couldn't talk to them. I love them so much." The barrier surrounding my siblings did not subside after our confrontation, so I stopped engaging altogether. As much as it hurt to be absent, I isolated myself in hopes that the husband and wife would work on relationships with one another and their children. As I retreated, my siblings forged friendship with the Well-Wishers instead; perhaps they refuse my existence, just to accept another.
I don't how many times I've heard the phrase, "Time will Change things," - Nor do I know anyone willing to hear my side of things at this point. While it's always been my choice to be present, it is difficult to exist with Rejection and Well-Wishers who assume change will take place with Time by their side. They may all be blinded by a friendly demeanor, but refuse to acknowledge the tension in the room. Sometimes I wonder if I‘m the Spotted Leper, cursed with social stigma from the strength in my voice and opinions. I don't force myself to engage them or anyone associated; This whole time, I have remained silent. I have nothing positive to say about this now, except: Be Careful what you Wish for.
I hope you got exactly what you wanted.
- - - - -
Related Content:
https://atcampiris.blogspot.com/2019/07/pull-trigger.html - Pull the Trigger
https://atcampiris.blogspot.com/2019/05/disengagement-party.html - Disengagement Party
https://atcampiris.blogspot.com/2019/04/wishing-well.html - Wishing Well
https://atcampiris.blogspot.com/2019/04/royal-family.html - Royal Family
One of the activities I recall most often involved group reading and reflection. I don’t remember which scriptures were referenced, but our discussion revolved around Lepers; people suffering disease and being cast from society. After reading, we were asked to write as if we witnessed Leprosy first hand. I wrote from the point of view of the Leper, asking God and others forgiveness for my unsightly appearance. When I shared my short essay, it brought the youth leader to tears. She asked if I knew anyone suffering illness or with physical disfigurement - at that time I didn't, but I understood loneliness. At the ripe age of 10, I identified with the Leprosy Stigma.
Two decades later, the Spotted Leper appears once again.
~
Earlier this year, I came across Well-Wishers regarding the ongoing family drama. I explained my issues with the situation, being barred from my niece and nephew. To which they responded, "I would be crushed if I couldn't talk to them. I love them so much." The barrier surrounding my siblings did not subside after our confrontation, so I stopped engaging altogether. As much as it hurt to be absent, I isolated myself in hopes that the husband and wife would work on relationships with one another and their children. As I retreated, my siblings forged friendship with the Well-Wishers instead; perhaps they refuse my existence, just to accept another.
I don't how many times I've heard the phrase, "Time will Change things," - Nor do I know anyone willing to hear my side of things at this point. While it's always been my choice to be present, it is difficult to exist with Rejection and Well-Wishers who assume change will take place with Time by their side. They may all be blinded by a friendly demeanor, but refuse to acknowledge the tension in the room. Sometimes I wonder if I‘m the Spotted Leper, cursed with social stigma from the strength in my voice and opinions. I don't force myself to engage them or anyone associated; This whole time, I have remained silent. I have nothing positive to say about this now, except: Be Careful what you Wish for.
I hope you got exactly what you wanted.
- - - - -
Related Content:
https://atcampiris.blogspot.com/2019/07/pull-trigger.html - Pull the Trigger
https://atcampiris.blogspot.com/2019/05/disengagement-party.html - Disengagement Party
https://atcampiris.blogspot.com/2019/04/wishing-well.html - Wishing Well
https://atcampiris.blogspot.com/2019/04/royal-family.html - Royal Family
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