The other night, I navigated shallow bodies of water: crossing wooden bridges and climbing mossy stones. I remember lifting duffel bags from the soil and slinging them over my shoulders like a familiar wandering warrior. I don't know who those items belonged to, but I took them along the path anyway. Carrying the excess weight, I stumbled into the pools and was soon assisted by allies. When I recovered, I noticed someone floating across the water like a Lotus to a lily pad. Their eyes were closed, so I thought they were meditating. Then they spoke.
“Fuck Off, You Stupid Bitch ...”
Someone seemingly calm expressed so much disdain in a single breath. No other words were spoken beyond this, but I understood - I took up space where I wasn’t wanted. I didn’t question this interaction and continued on my way; I carried the luggage hand in hand and left. Leave the Lotus Be.
- - - - -
Of all the emotions, I think Anger has been one of the most challenging for me to understand, because of the ways I’ve seen it displayed. I feel this is an expression that people don't always know how to contain or direct safely, as Anger is notably synonymous with Hostility. Recalling my childhood: I often had tantrums that placed others in positions of unnecessary harm - I'm still learning to forgive my past self for those moments. Though, I’ve realized over time that Anger can embody an intense silence or immovable figure, much like the one I saw in my vision.
How can we expect to understand things in life if we haven’t fully lived them? Anger is something that needs to be seen, heard and experienced just like every emotion on the spectrum. Some people do not always have an outlet to redirect the energy appropriately and what most often ends up happening is that the emotion ends up living with us. When Anger cultivates over time, it has the potential to become Resentment. We tend to tread unknown waters, as people are unpredictable when they are emotionally charged.
For the longest time, I pictured my Anger having the likeness of an untamed beast, as I have religiously shielded it from ever being exposed as an adult. I've always been pensive of expressing raw emotions and withheld these parts of myself on multiple occasions, without knowing how to actually express them. My Mother once told me to release any grudges I ever held onto, because she said that they only eat you up inside. I suppose one of my active goals as an individual is to safely release bottled feelings more freely.
There is a time and place to let these expressions breathe as they need to, though I don’t know that anyone ever needs to see Anger unleashed, unless they’re purposely Antagonizing it. I sense part of me continues holding most of it back, because in it's purest form, Anger is truly misunderstood. Rather than resorting to violence or letting the emotion consume me, I would often practice mindfulness. I have never viewed my own silence as weakness however, as I know that it requires a level of strength and discipline to quiet those demons.
"Sometimes the most important battle, is the battle within ..."
“Fuck Off, You Stupid Bitch ...”
Someone seemingly calm expressed so much disdain in a single breath. No other words were spoken beyond this, but I understood - I took up space where I wasn’t wanted. I didn’t question this interaction and continued on my way; I carried the luggage hand in hand and left. Leave the Lotus Be.
- - - - -
Of all the emotions, I think Anger has been one of the most challenging for me to understand, because of the ways I’ve seen it displayed. I feel this is an expression that people don't always know how to contain or direct safely, as Anger is notably synonymous with Hostility. Recalling my childhood: I often had tantrums that placed others in positions of unnecessary harm - I'm still learning to forgive my past self for those moments. Though, I’ve realized over time that Anger can embody an intense silence or immovable figure, much like the one I saw in my vision.
How can we expect to understand things in life if we haven’t fully lived them? Anger is something that needs to be seen, heard and experienced just like every emotion on the spectrum. Some people do not always have an outlet to redirect the energy appropriately and what most often ends up happening is that the emotion ends up living with us. When Anger cultivates over time, it has the potential to become Resentment. We tend to tread unknown waters, as people are unpredictable when they are emotionally charged.
For the longest time, I pictured my Anger having the likeness of an untamed beast, as I have religiously shielded it from ever being exposed as an adult. I've always been pensive of expressing raw emotions and withheld these parts of myself on multiple occasions, without knowing how to actually express them. My Mother once told me to release any grudges I ever held onto, because she said that they only eat you up inside. I suppose one of my active goals as an individual is to safely release bottled feelings more freely.
There is a time and place to let these expressions breathe as they need to, though I don’t know that anyone ever needs to see Anger unleashed, unless they’re purposely Antagonizing it. I sense part of me continues holding most of it back, because in it's purest form, Anger is truly misunderstood. Rather than resorting to violence or letting the emotion consume me, I would often practice mindfulness. I have never viewed my own silence as weakness however, as I know that it requires a level of strength and discipline to quiet those demons.
"Sometimes the most important battle, is the battle within ..."
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