Earlier this month, I had visions of being welcomed into familiar territory. I'm not sure if this was the house that I grew up in or if it was the house of another friend, but something leads me to believe that our childhood homes were structurally similar. I remember entering this space feeling as though I've walked through it before. One of my old friends greeted me at the door and invited me to sit down at a desk. Something strange about the surface was that it overlapped as though it was conjoined, similar to jigsaw puzzle pieces. Nothing about this was uncomfortable though, I sat easily and fit perfectly; I was meant to be here.
Inside the house I heard voices of other people passing through, unrelated to the person who welcomed me at the door. I soon realized that this place wasn't so much about who the house belonged to, but it served as a communal area to be around familiar faces. This isn't necessarily about family, but I sense more about the feeling of belonging. One of my surrogate sisters walked into the living room where I sat. She and another friend greeted me warmly and talked about an illustration that I made. They had so many nice things to say about my skills as an artist, I was flattered by their kindness. When they showed me the image, I don't recall ever having drawn it before! They insisted that the work of art belonged to me.
While my friends talked among themselves, I caught a glance of another figure in passing. I knew someone had been there, as the air shifted around me; I didn't feel threatened, but I sensed someone had been watching. I couldn't see this person entirely, just a piece of their profile through the hallways of the house. I began to wonder if they did that intentionally? I imagine this interaction like a game of hide and seek, where the player may give hints to where they are. I tried looking around to see if there was anyone beyond the partition that divided us, but chose not to pursue any further than that. After, I rejoined friends on their big comfy couch and enjoyed company.
Regarding the person who crossed paths, it felt as though I saw the shadow of someone who no longer exists; I sense this is someone that I knew in the past. When I see them within these spaces, I often wonder if they can see me in this dimension, too? I think about what they're able to see and how they choose to interact. This particular vision forced me to examine my own social interactions. While I want to spend time with familiar faces in communal areas, there are parts of me that do not always want to engage. I understand the desire to be seen and acknowledged, as well as the necessity to reserve oneself. I think it's interesting that even while we are capable of lucid dreaming, boundary is regularly expressed in this realm.
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