I remember climbing a wood grain wall and crammed into a crawlspace above. Then I navigated a series of tunnels, snaking my way out. I possessed incredible agility and flexibility, but could not find an exit to the outdoors. When I emerged from the tubular maze, I raced around the corner, only to find the woodgrain wall once again. I ran these obstacles multiple times before realizing I was in a loop. It felt as if I were a mouse caught in someone’s cage. I sensed someone watching, stalking overhead.
I thought if I swiftly maneuvered through the pipes, I would be safe and remain hidden from them. This was not the case, as I felt the creeper following closely. I ran circles around the maze thinking, “They can’t catch what they can’t see.” Like a lab rat that laps around the running wheel: you could run for miles, but won't go anywhere. In my wake, I realized existence within the cage is not the purpose of living. I don’t see myself as running away from anything, I simply do not wish to be perceived.
After receiving this vision, I’m reminded that human vultures are alive and thriving. When I recall people associated with this energy, I’m met with unnecessary violence and hostility. They have no business engaging, but scum keeps lurking, because pathetic people have nothing better to do with their lives. The only reason they’re relevant is because others who are blissfully ignorant enable their existence. Believe that there is nothing left to salvage or reconcile, as they violated every opportunity to be civil.
I’ve learned that there are disturbed individuals who are not worthy of time or attention. They sabotage and manipulate Joy when it’s right in front of them; I grow tired and almost feel pity. Then I’m reminded that they constantly degraded me while I knew them. I am not a rat trapped within their cage: I Do Not exist for their perverted entertainment or experimentation. Sometimes, I wish they would be exposed for their crimes, but I realize they’re actually suffering. So I disassociate, because I feel nothing for them.
“A Lesson repeats itself until it is learned.” Frank Sonnenberg
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