One Silver Mine

May God have Mercy on the damned, because I do not. Maybe Satan saves a place for them in Hell.

Years ago, I stopped forgiving blindly, so I could save myself from absolute destruction. It took YEARS for me to understand that walking away from an abusive situation was ever an option. The past version of me might argue that it wasn't that simple. Being the naive person that I was, I stuck around thinking that putting in more effort would salvage any connection. When I look back at that part of my life, I realize that the compassion I gave so freely is something I need to reserve for myself today. 

People say that healing is non-linear and it's entirely true. When I look at the past version of myself, it's challenging accepting that this was another lifetime ago. I have not completely released the pain from my past life, because I suffered quietly for an extensive amount of time. I return to this deeply wounded version of myself, because part of me wants to Avenge Her. I don't know if this desire stems from Courage or Foolishness; maybe they are one and the same. 

I no longer dismiss my Anger, because I understand how greatly I’ve been disrespected. 

I refuse to back down from this stand and am giving my inner voice a platform to exist.

The quote that comes to mind, "You are allowed to reinvent yourself as many times needed." On the post-traumatic timeline, I feel as though I have lived multiple lives since growing beyond my broken self. There are days where I am full of vitality and purpose, then other moments I'm triggered by something and become violently reactive. Of my positive gains, I have built the confidence to speak up and advocate for myself. I stopped settling for things that are not worth my energy and am developing a fulfilling life that makes sense to me.

All aspects of self; Past, Present and Potential can coexist. This means all parts are valid and need space to exist. 

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One Silver Mine

Even Iron Smile

Mine Love Risen

Nine More Lives