I don't know how common this experience is, but I sense it needs to be addressed. There have been multiple occasions where I was verbally and physically harassed by complete strangers, just for existing. These interactions always baffled me, because I did nothing to agitate those people. This often made me question myself and led me to believe I was targeted because of my disposition; throughout adolescence, I assumed myself being an unlikable tomboy, or an unattractive female. However, another part of me worked hard to resist self-sabotage, so I could encourage myself and rise above it.
This past month I've been considering my values, thinking of the things I'm most passionate about in Life. One of the most encouraging things my parents ever said was, "Some people aren't Fighters - Some people are Writers." This message resonates deeply as it's helped me recognize my Strengths with intellect and empathy. I understand my weaknesses as well, but am working toward protecting myself as necessary. How I approach challenge will not be the same way others address their own. Once I started saying "we're doing everything we think we're supposed to be doing," it helped me worry less about the things I cannot change.
As I make efforts to connect and communicate with others, I'm encouraged by Reciprocity. I appreciate whenever coworkers, friends and family can make themselves present with me, as I do so with them. I find it challenging to be around people who primarily serve themselves and I have little desire to entertain those who show no respect or regard. Now I feel less afraid of humiliation or loss and I've learned to respond in ways that does not require retaliation. I'm reminded to express Loyalty with myself before anyone and I see how greatly this changes the way I carry myself.
Over time, I realized my presence challenges some people, but it has nothing to do with threatening or intimidating anyone. I am not dismissing my experiences in Anger or Frustration, but I've Never perceived myself as an Aggressive person. Even when I'm provoked by others, I have a strong tendency to hold still as I never believed violence would solve anything. I don't assert myself, but I've learned to stand confidently and be as honest as possible. People are often surprised by my authenticity and how I allow myself to be vulnerable. It may be foolish, but Truth does not hide from Reality.
I would often hear that Sincerity and Honesty are rare aspects in people. I find it Liberating as I release all of the things that do not speak to my highest self.
To Lay Unchained : Can You Handle It?
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Related Content:
https://atcampiris.blogspot.com/2020/04/poetry-ember-of-myself.html - the Ember of Myself : Myself before Them.
https://atcampiris.blogspot.com/2020/03/lifes-gold-hymn.html - Life's Gold Hymn : Holding Myself
https://atcampiris.blogspot.com/2020/02/power.html - Protect Other Women Everywhere Religiously.
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